You’ll be hard pressed to find a teenager who wants to become like his parents.
I wasn’t any different.
While my parents most lovely attributes glowed in my eyes as a kid, adolescence brought their most unfortunate struggles into focus.
So I’d swear up-and-down that I’d never be that way. (just as any self-respecting teenager would).
Now that I’m twice my age and have been a parent for eight years (or 20 collective years), I’m understanding my parents more.
I see both their strengths and their flaws in myself.
I’m learning that I can’t excuse their sins toward me or mine toward my kids, but I am identifying more with them daily.
and that allows me to engage the process of forgiveness…
I wasn’t battered or abused or abandoned or ignored.
I was held and loved and accepted and challenged.
Remembering those things makes the process pretty easy.
I still hope to avoid as many of those errors as I can… I think that’s part of the wonder of family and generations.
To learn from the good and the bad.
I know that I won’t avoid them all (and I’m certain to make new mistakes of my own), and that has made me more sensitive to my parenting.
Because even though I can’t be holy and righteous as a parent all the time, I can recognize my failures quickly and humbly seek my kids’ forgiveness.
and try not to make the same mistakes over and over.
and be honest, brutally honest.
So that’s what I do.
Dedicated to Rick and Jackie. Happy Father’s day 2010, Dad.